Hey, it's Mike Waters from the Waters Wake Up Call Tax Day this morning.
And you know what you do to make Tax Day a little less painful?
Add some tunes.
So we did a Tax Tunes Day.
Well, it's a tax day, and I feel like your listeners should be aware of the new loophole they put in this year.
Whoa.
What's
the loop?
You get a $500 refund.
Even if you didn't work, all you had to do is fill out your ID10T form.
ID10T?
Just write
it down.
What is this form exactly?
No, hold on.
Don't tell me.
I'm going to Google it.
ID.
Okay.
An informal term in the tech industry for user error.
But the error thing means the user is the problem.
It's a play on the word idiot.
What?
It
might be a syntax error.
Yeah.
Well, in my opinion, I'd say every dollar they taxed is a sin.
I got off the dime, did it back in January.
So I'm already done and got my refund back.
Wow.
Johnny on the spot.
Do you get a refund?
I don't get a refund.
So I put
Put them off as long as I possibly can.
11.59, I'm poppin' it in the mail.
And that's not before noon, that's before midnight.
Well, I guess before midnight is also before noon.
No, it's afternoon.
A minute after midnight is before noon.
Oh.
Anyway.
It's a conundrum.
Yes.
Is it before noon or after noon?
I think that's an IRS term, conundrum.
Because that's all I have doing my taxes is conundrums.
I'm really good at bureaucratic red tape.
Are you?
Yeah, well I worked there a long time.
I usually put the caution tape around the table where I'm working on my
taxes.
It's not red, it's yellow.
Well,
as long as there's not a chalk line around you, you know, I think that's good.
Those who break the caution tape barrier will get their portrait done in
chalk.
Well,
good morning,
happy tax day.
Well, thank you.
The day you feel like you're being pricked by a million tax.
I'm just calling to let you know someone's watching you, man.
I know.
The IRS?
They are.
They're watching you.
You make all that money behind that desk playing tunes, sitting on your butt.
They're
watching you.
Well, and sometimes, and for me, sometimes means all the time, it feels like somebody's watching
me.
The law
one
always
wins, always.
It's disgusting.
I know, I know.
I keep trying to succeed in breaking the law that it never seems to work.
T, the best thing about you trying to beat the law is because you can play them tunes to beat them that way.
That's right.
They bring me to court, and I bring some 45s, and they go, ooh, what's that?
And then I explain it, and I put it on.
And it's usually, I fought the law, which is kind of ironic and quite a coink-a-dink as well.
And I play that, and they think, you know what?
That's true.
We should let him win every once in a while, and then they let me go.
I like that.
I like that how you said I brought
I thought
the law and the law won, but I brought my record player and I won.
I'm already not, so I know what's coming.
I know what's
coming.
the money and run.
Are you taking the money and run or is the IRS taking your money and running?
You know I always pay more in during the year so I'm guaranteed to get some.
It's kind of a forced savings plan but a lot of people think the government's using my money
and I'm
not getting any interest on it but sometimes if we can't touch the money now we can use it later.
I agree with that 100%.
That's usually what I do.
Well good.
I'm glad I'm
not
the
only one.
Maybe that'll give you some comfort.
Who
knows?
Money, money, money by Abba.
Money, money, money.
Always funny.
You know, three monies is always better than one.
Absolutely.
I wish I had some.
Well, the three monies are good as long as you're getting payback, but if you're paying in, it's not so good.
But you only get a payback if you're poor to be happy.
Yes!
Well, I'm poor, so I guess I should be getting something back.
Well, I did.
All right, well, drinks are on you then.
Absolutely.
Come on
over.
Woo-hoo!
I think that's exactly what we need for tax day.
Absolutely.
Good morning, Mr. Waters.
How are you?
I am fantastic.
Happy tax day.
You paying in or you get a little something back?
I'm kind of ignoring them.
Oh, you're ignoring?
Oh, that should end up very nicely for you.
I know when you ignore the IRS, they just go away.
So good for you.
One of your shares.
I'm not worried about it.
Hey, if you're not worried, I'm not worried.
You know what?
I was claimed one dependent.
There
are no guarantees in this world.
There are none, unless maybe you're buying furniture, but otherwise, no guarantees at
all.
Basically, if you realize the only guarantee you're getting is a guarantee to be screwed, then you get guarantees all the time.
Oh, this has been a fun conversation.
Well, thank you, and I've enjoyed it
myself.
Oh, good.
Although it has been a little taxing.
I could use a nap.
Hi, Mr. Waters.
This is the other Mrs. Waters in Cedar Rapids.
Well, hello, other Mrs. Waters.
So
you're... The long lost sister?
Yes, my long lost sister.
That's exactly right.
That's exactly right.
And the guy and your husband calls me and he says he's the real Mr. Waters, right?
I know.
Anyway, I tested it too, but I'm getting ready to go to physical therapy, but I sent you a text.
Text day for me is like burning Ring of Fire.
Ring of Fire!
Yep!
I know you
don't play country, but there we go.
That's what
I think is going to say IRS.
Well, that's very appropriate.
But how about I play the hit slash rock counterpart for Ring of Fire?
That would
be great.
All right.
Have a good day.
All right.
Thank you, other Mrs. Waters.
I hope you don't have to pay too much in.
I know you do some hard work out on the roads.
They're doing the road construction.
Are you getting money back this year?
No.
Ah, hell.
I
get state back, but the federal end up taking the state.
So
you know, it's like the government is eating itself.
That's kind of what that is.
It's consuming itself.
Oh, I agree.
Yeah, it just seems a little cannibalistic to me.
I'm sorry.
It's
not right.
Nope.
Yeah
first you're dealing with the angry drivers who have to slow down because of the construction and and I'm sure sometimes you're getting fingers and other things and then the money you get you got to give it back to Uncle Sam.
Do you have a particular song you would like to dedicate to the IRS?
I've played it.
That and money.
Oh
man, not there.
I know.
I woke up too late, man.
See, that's your typical Floyd fan.
They usually get up around noon.
You're really up early for a Floyd fan.
I said a doctor's appointment.
You know,
they don't leave.
No, they don't.
I'm gonna think of another Floyd tune we can play for Tax Day.
I was thinking of another one, though.
It's the guys who are loading the refrigerators and they want their money for...
Money for
nothing.
Money for nothing, that seems like what the government does.
It's money for nothing.
Yeah, they take the money for nothing and then we're in dire straits.
Yes, yes!
That is our tax day song, there we go.
Ba boom!
Awesome, thanks Mr. Waters, you have a great day.
You know, it did get Wandom a day early with one call.
Just getting out the 45s.
It's all us live and local
DJs.
playing the same thong from the same strange service.
Well, that's what corporate radio does, not us live and local folk.
We're here in Hiawatha, Iowa, as a matter of fact.
Hiawatha?
Oh,
that's crazy.
Well, they don't call us crazy KZ for nothing.
What, are they at gas stations?
No.
Why do you think we're broadcasting from a gas station?
Does it sound like I have gas?
Oh, no.
It was a radio station that was located at one.
the gas
you know that's a pretty good idea we could be the the gas station radio station we'll give you gas in music and even more gas if you eat the gas station hot dogs weekday mornings 5 30 to
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