First of all, Meta gave thousands of poor performance reviews to employees.
Probably because they spent all day at the office on Facebook.
That's probably why.
So a NASA satellite captured new images of the Earth from space.
The photos are so detailed you can see smog in India and gunfire in the US.
So Wallet Hub named San Francisco the hardest working city in the US.
Evidently, the Giants did not get the memo.
And apparently, Wallet Hub does not visit Iowa, because then they would have understood that we, we are the hardest working.
Today is, like I've been saying, no brainer day.
And to celebrate...
I'm going to try to decide whether to leave work early and hit up happy hour or or go home and get nagged by my wife to clean out the garage.
Maybe I'm just kidding, honey.
Study found that having kids can reduce your happiness.
That's right.
I said it just because the study said so.
But a study found I'm going to say it again.
Study found that having kids can reduce your happiness.
In related news, Nick Cannon was just hospitalized for crippling depression.
How many kids does he have now, like, 37 or something?
So, cocaine bear, box office hit over the weekend, and Woody Harrelson hosted Saturday Night Live.
It was the best weekend for drugs since Charlie Sheen stopped having house parties, so... Yeah.
Cocaine Bear made 23 million dollars at the box office over the weekend and many parts of the country including Southern California had record snowfall, so it was also a huge weekend for white powder.
And thanks to the success of Cocaine Bear, there is a movie in the works now called Attack of the Meth.
Gator.
Attack of the meth gator.
No, that's not a joke.
That's true.
Attack of the meth gator.
And don't worry.
I mean, something like this could never actually happen outside of Florida.
And by the way, I mean, the gator's on meth.
What's so scary about an alligator with no teeth?
Answer me that.
And finally, Yoko Ono has left New York City after 50 years.
In totally unrelated news, noise pollution levels in New York City are at record loads.
That's all I got.
Water's here from the water's wake of call.
This morning I asked this question for no-brainer day.
How is it some people fail so miserably at something that requires no brains whatsoever?
Or does it just come in from the North Country?
How is the North Country this morning?
Driving through flooded areas.
There is a big ol' no-no.
Idiot proof.
The otter creek is out of its banks and you don't drive into flooded areas.
That should be a no-brainer!
Maybe some people have the flood water on the brain?
The bodies of water are getting high, and when that happens, a lot of times it goes over to land and sometimes even reaches the roads, and you could get stuck.
Yeah, and I don't want to get stuck.
No, unless you have an amphibious vehicle, which I think they need to come up with around here.
I think that's
kind of a
no-brainer.
They used to call those ducks when I was a kid.
Duck boats.
I think we need to make some of these.
I think the duck boats are a no-brainer.
Yeah, yeah.
I wanted to talk about...
You know, we don't go through flooded areas.
I think you explained it very nicely, and I think you even idiot-proofed
it.
I'm a Norwegian.
Goodbye.
This is the man with the pickle to put the laugh in the tickle.
It's the one to two free man calling this morning.
Well, what do you know?
You sound crazy, so I'm glad you're calling.
Well,
that's
good.
Do you have anything on the list of no-brainers you would like to share, Mr. Pickleman?
Always.
Make sure you have toilet paper before you sit down.
If you break that rule, your brain is probably in what you're sitting down on.
Right.
Especially if a storm's coming.
Hopefully you've gone to the store and you've gotten plenty of toilet paper.
along with the milk and the bread and the stuff.
Yeah, Sam's Club.
Sam's Club or Costco, get the bulk toilet paper, because you never know when a storm's a coming.
Or the shelves will be empty, correct?
No brainer, no brainer.
Pickle man.
Good morning, Mike.
Good morning, Iron Man.
How are you, sunshine?
What would you give me as a no-brainer?
No,
it sure isn't.
That could kill the animals.
If
you want your animal to be healthy, you don't give them crap.
Don't put that stuff in your own body.
Don't put it in their
body.
parties when we were younger and again when we were much younger and some things illegal were being smoked and some of the people they had a cat or a dog would blow the smoke in the animals face and I thought that was about as cruel a thing as you could possibly do.
Oh,
yeah.
It's like, oh, watching my cat get high.
Right.
God knows what they're thinking.
They're probably just terrified.
They have no idea what's going on.
killing your cat.
They're depending on you to keep them safe and you shouldn't be doing anything that does any harm to them whatsoever.
No, me and my wife go down there and donate our time and it's just some of the stuff that we see is just unreal.
Where do you donate
your time?
Down at the animal shelter in Tama.
Okay, that's awesome, man.
I'm perplexed.
Are you going to play any music to accompany your theme today?
Well, I think we could find probably some no-brainer tunes.
Go through the computer.
I don't know if anybody covers the topic.
That's going to be top ten.
Well, there's chain of fools.
Won't get fooled again.
There's what a fool believes.
Yeah, it
won't get fooled again.
Yeah.
I think
that's wrong by the who.
Play that.
That's got a beat to it and a positive.
You know what?
I think if we made everything idiot-proof and made everything no-brainers, people wouldn't get...
fooled again
yeah but there's people in power that wouldn't like that they like having a pool of stupidity out there mr. waters
oh I know I know they like to keep us dumb so they can pull stuff on us and we go oh what happened there
yeah then they just point the finger blame of whoever's standing next to him you know how the drill
goes weekday mornings 5
30
to
10