The headline?
Yeah, that made a hit and run this morning.
I want more headlines.
Those are joke headlines.
I am speechless.
I am without speech.
All right, so I'm sure you've heard.
President Biden said there's a risk of nuclear Armageddon.
Personally, that's a relief.
I mean, for a second, I thought we were at risk of getting a sequel to the movie Armageddon.
That's...
That's nothing I'm prepared for.
Fortunately, he had decriminalized weed the day before, so dude, I'm all good.
A man rode a camel through the in-and-out drive-through in Las Vegas.
A camel!
But really, the dumbest thing to see in Vegas remains carrot top.
You ever seen carrot top?
Yeah, you know what I'm talking about.
So dancers at a strip club in Los Angeles are trying to become the only unionized strippers in the country.
And by the way, they would also have the only union where dues are paid with crumpled up $1 bills.
So there's a new Hellraiser movie that came out over the weekend with a female version of the evil villain Pinhead.
So the tortures she inflicts on people include yelling at them for leaving the toilet seat up and taking them on a weekend winery getaway with her parents.
Oh, no, that's Mrs. Waters.
No.
Did you hear David Lee Roth?
68 years old today.
Happy birthday, Diamond Dave.
I know he's listening at 1057kokz.com.
And you know what?
At his age, he's more suited for the band Mini Van Halen.
All right, there you go.
Those are your hit-and-run headlines for a beautiful, moon-filled Monday morning.