It's springtime in Iowa, Tom Garland, which means I'm starting to see things that are the wildlife is coming back.
Yeah, it is.
You know, you start to see the birds kind of flying around.
You see the squirrels kind of dancing around and they're picking up some stuff.
You see people blasting vapes out there.
And there seems to be a combination of the both in London right now because they're experiencing this.
You think you got it bad.
Wildlife experts in London are sounding the alarm about discarding vape cartridges after a squirrel was caught on video Vaping in the park Bystanders video captured a gray squirrel nibbling on a discarded vape while perched on a wooden fence This isn't an isolated incident either photos and videos circulating on social media show that squirrels both in the UK and the US chewing on carrying and even trying to pry apart discarded vape
devices.
Now, I'll be fair here that, you know, when I brought you in here this morning, I thought you'd go, boof.
Oh yeah, I hit the babe.
Yeah, I'm not surprised that it's so addicting.
It's the most addicting thing I've ever done.
I'm not surprised that it's made its way into Animal Planet.
Like,
yeah, totally.
You just see the squirrel like blowing clouds instead.
Instead of, instead of hiding nuts, he'll just be pushing a mixtape next.
Yeah.
On the corner like yeah, man, this is my music man.
I work real hard.
I just just listen to this man.
I just need one shot mom spaghetti In London too, that's I bet I'd love to see the reactions.
Have you been to London?
No, I have I've done stand up there.
Have
you?
Oh, yes, I've been to London.
It's a horrible place to go Brian They don't have air conditioning they have warm beer and everything must be posh
It must be very posh.
They would see that squirrel and be like, that's not right.
It's not posh.
It's not posh.
It's vape spice.
Yeah, come in and
have tea with us.
Relax, squirrel.
That mixtape, that killed me.
Dude, remember?
I mean, like, that's just what the new generation does.
They ruin everything, dude.
It used to be Alvin and the chipmunks.
OK.
Right?
Now it's Alvin selling crypto.
You're like, what?
Hitting the vape, man.
Even rats would see that and be like, gross.
The Rock 108 Morning Show.
Who used all the
Wi-Fi?
Ah, apartment life.
Bad Wi-Fi, mystery laundry piles, and a roommate who says, I'll Venmo you.
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Wait, we have a washer and dryer in the apartment?
You
know, if you really take off with your Vegas stuff, you might have some extra money to blow on this.
I know you said you have a MacBook, right?
I do have a MacBook.
It's an old one, though.
Oh, is it?
Yeah, I
could use a new one.
Someone created a $5 novelty app that makes your MacBook moan and more and more if you slap it.
Oh, yeah.
You want to take a listen?
Yeah, do it.
Okay, take a listen to this.
This is my new favorite app.
It's called SlapMac.
And... Basically, you slap your mouth and it makes sound.
The goat one.
Uh-oh.
And it
also
counts how many times you slapped it.
You know, sometimes
you have to have that goat noise.
Sometimes they're like, you know, the AI, it doesn't feel anything.
I felt that last one before it.
That sounded like, wow.
Took one person two days to create.
It made $5,000 in only three days.
Wow.
The American dream.
Yeah.
For the British dream.
I don't know what nationality she was.
She had a nice voice though.
She could sell me anything.
Yeah.
She could sell me a male one that moans.
Oh, that sounded like a woman to me.
that the moan did.
Yeah, I agree with you.
If she was like, oh, this one is wonderful.
He's a MacBook and you just you smack it and it's.
Oh, yeah.
It'd be like, OK, I'll take it.
Two for one special sounds like the truck stop.
Oh, no, like a love son.
I'm on the road.
Oh, you know, yeah, trying to get all over the country.
You
have been.
Yeah.
One of the things I mentioned yesterday, Tom, is that some people, they get to the very top of their game.
Legitimately, in this case.
Yes.
I mean, the very top of the game.
Video games made about you, that people on Sundays are wearing red shirts out on the golf course because you are the greatest.
You are the Michael Jordan of your particular sports.
Now you're the Michael Jordan, or in this case, the Tiger Woods of rolling cars.
Because of DUI's Tiger Woods arrested Friday afternoon in Florida for DUI He was on a two-lane road when a pickup truck towing an equipment trailer had slowed down to make a turn and Tiger Driving his Land Rover Rolls a vehicle.
So you see this?
Yes, Tiger is
such a clown I've never been able to take him here.
Here's the thing is I think he is Incredible at golf always has been I think it's such a boring industry Oh that it causes him to be an intense person
in regard, right?
I mean, just imagine going to work every day and everybody's whispering.
Nice job, Doug.
Nice job, nice lay.
I slay Tiger.
He's like,
I'm gonna
get laid.
I can't stand
this.
Stop
whispering at me.
I'm gonna go nuts.
I'm gonna drink and drive and call huckers.
I'm going crazy, you know, but the guy, you know, we're in Iowa.
The guy likes to drink.
Yeah, I can't blame him.
He shouldn't get behind the wheel,
but he likes to
drink.
So, you know, that's what my top five is today.
If you want to drink like Tiger Woods, don't drive like him.
If you want to drink like him, these are the top five
Favorite drinks of Tiger Woods number five the affair on the rocks They let your wife stir this one with a golf.
Oh, yeah, okay She might break your back window first, but she'll own that golf club afterward I'd love to find that golf club that she whacked him with on eBay
These are the top five favorite drinks of Tiger Woods.
Number four, the DUI Dackery.
Okay.
This one has flashing lights in it, Brian.
I
put a little ice cube in there.
Yeah, red and blue.
Yeah, red,
blue, red, blue,
red, blue.
These are the top five favorite drinks of Tiger Woods.
Number three, the Caddy Tears Everclear.
Okay.
Yep.
It's 99% green alcohol, Brian, and 1% tears from the only person in his life who cares.
Tiger, I think I think you should use a pitching wedge or never mind your drunk.
How about using an Uber or
a lift?
What was the name of that one again?
What was the name of number three?
It's the caddy tears ever clear.
Oh my gosh.
Somebody please get that on your menu.
Caddy tears ever clear from Big Gro Brewery.
Oh gosh.
Number two.
Number two.
Sorry.
That's probably top five favorite drinks of Tiger Woods.
This number two.
Number two, excuse me, the text screen spritz.
Text, now all of a sudden I can't read, I'm drunk like Tiger
Woods.
You're rolling in the edge.
This has just rolled.
Number two is the text screen shot spritz.
Okay.
Screen shot.
This one will inebriate yourself and incriminate yourself.
Like Merry Christmas, my wife just went to sleep.
You're like, this is your wife.
I love it.
Don't sell that to TMZ.
These were the top five favorite drinks of Tiger Woods.
Number one, the driver's license dirty martini.
And that's for when your inhibitions and right to drive have both been suspended.
Yeah, sitting behind bars for just a little bit longer.
Yeah, you can get on the prison golf team.
Yeah, it'd be great.
That's a big sandbox.
Yeah.
The Rock 108
morning show.