Transcript
1-13-26 Brian's Brainbuster - Confident In An Emergency
The Rock 108 Morning Show with Brian Marshall · Tue Jan 13, 2026
Admit it, you're just
gonna guess.
I know it, I know it, hold on.
It's Brian's brain buster on rock 108.
Question today, nearly half of people surveyed believe they could confidently do this in an emergency.
So what is it?
Earlier guesses included scream and just lose it.
Why not tie a tourniquet or stop a train?
Guesses now, Chantal said use a fire extinguisher.
Yeah, there's different types of fire extinguishers, and knowing what you can use on an electrical fire versus a grease fire, Tom Garland.
You know, you gotta know what you're doing.
You know what I always think when I see stuff like that?
Can I make a guess?
I guess this can be a guess.
All right.
I think that I would be able to film it, but probably not in real life.
That's what people do, right?
There's like an emergency they film.
Sometimes the news is like encouraging that.
They're like,
You know, the news will be like, there's a tornado, get down to your basement, put a helmet on, but send us your videos too.
Go outside to your porch.
Make sure you're safe.
Yeah, but send them on over.
I mean, KCRG is, they like that.
Yeah, you know, that is, that's hilarious.
Everybody likes a good Iowa tornado video, step outside.
Yeah, go propose in front of it.
That's how Midwest everybody does it.
The Rock 108 Morning Show.
Who used all the Wi-Fi?
Ah, apartment life.
Bad Wi-Fi, mystery laundry piles, and a roommate who says, I'll Venmo you.
Maybe 2027 deserves an upgrade.
Coming August 2027, Four Lakes Properties introduces the brand new Union Station Apartments, furnished in-unit washer and dryer.
Internet included a great central downtown location, one to five bedroom apartments, and no double occupancy fees.
That's less adulting and more actually enjoying where you live.
Union Station Apartments, now leasing from Four Lakes Properties.
Wait, we have a washer and dryer in the apartment?
Do
you think you got it bad?
In this case, doctors in China left stunned when a 61-year-old man arrived at the hospital had severe abdominal pains.
I mean, it happens.
Right.
Go to an emergency room.
After running scans, surgeons discovered that he had a large sweet potato lodged in his rectum.
Like you do.
That's an odd choice.
Yeah, he had a sweet potato.
Hospital staff, the man admitted that he had inserted the sweet potato
Out of boredom Late at night You know nothing good happens after two o'clock in the morning and you look inside your fridge or your uh crisper drawer and you go What's that thing right there?
I can honestly say I've never been that bored Remember like man, there's nothing to do.
What is what is in my cupboard now that I could insert into my body Tom He does this
he puts it in right right and then goes to sleep
Only to wake up hours later in intense pain.
Why do you think that might be?
Perhaps because you didn't remove the yam from your
backside?
I feel like that's a frequency thing like that's you know when they say like
You get pulled over and they're like, you know, it's not your first time running a red light.
Sure.
You
know, that's the thing that you do.
You you obviously are a person that runs red lights.
I just happen to catch you this time.
That's that's a regular thing for him.
That wasn't a first time.
If you're at the point where you've inserted the sweet potato and you're like, I'm just going to go to sleep.
That one wasn't as exciting as the last.
Didn't really have the ridges I'm used to.
Yeah.
Yeah.
I just wonder, like.
You bring up a good point or in this case a potato Does he start with like stewing potatoes does he start with you know like the little guys that you do the little golden ones?
Yeah, just hope for the best.
Does he cook it first?
Is there well?
Yeah, is there sour cream?
What do you call that?
That's not an air fryer at that point is it?
The rock 108 morning show
Who used all the Wi-Fi?
Ah, apartment life.
Bad Wi-Fi, mystery laundry piles, and a roommate who says, I'll Venmo you.
Maybe 2027 deserves an upgrade.
Coming August 2027, Four Lakes Properties introduces the brand new Union Station Apartments, furnished in-unit washer and dryer.
Internet included a great central downtown location, one to five bedroom apartments, and no double occupancy fees.
That's less adulting and more actually enjoying where you live.
Union Station Apartments, now leasing from Four Lakes Properties.
Wait, we have a washer and dryer in the apartment?
Apartment?
Who used all the Wi-Fi?
Ah, apartment life.
Bad Wi-Fi, mystery laundry piles, and a roommate who says, I'll Venmo you.
Maybe 2027 deserves an upgrade.
Coming August 2027, Four Lakes Properties introduces the brand new Union Station Apartments, furnished in-unit washer and dryer.
Internet included a great central downtown location, one to five bedroom apartments, and no double occupancy fees.
That's less adulting and more actually enjoying where you live.
Union Station Apartments, now leasing from Four Lakes Properties.
Wait, we have a washer and dryer in the apartment?
It's
Top 5 Tuesday on The Rock 108 Morning Show.
Friend of the show, Tom Garland is in here on Tuesdays, stand-up comedian, filmmaker, and more.
All at tomgarlandstandup.com.
And recently, thanks for the props on KCRG the other day when you were on.
Yeah, it was fun, man.
I went on every day Iowa with our mutual friend, Justin Roberts, who does the weather on here sometimes.
So that was fun.
And yeah, I got to tell some jokes on there and had to give a shout out.
to P1 nation.
I appreciated that very much and to see how you knew exactly where the cameras were and where to look.
It's like you've done this before.
Yeah, that's that's called the failing out of of J school in Iowa.
Yeah.
So, you know, it was interesting when you came in today, you had your bears clothing on.
And, you know, usually when you wear bears clothing in mixed company, it's, you know,
I've got I've got I've got the towel because my parents were there.
that's awesome yeah yeah yeah we won we never win let alone a playoff game against the Packers and he can't beat that you're a Vikings fan right yeah Vikings fan yeah that's tough yeah it's tough you guys are gonna get a good draft pick though oh yeah that's still look forward to yeah I can see it now with the number 18 pick of the 2026 NFL draft the Minnesota Vikings select
More male cheerleaders.
They're just in the crowd.
Give me a D. That's the
chance.
Just give me a D.
Who
wouldn't want to play in Minnesota though, Brian?
You guys have everything.
Everything you need to get a player just to want to come there to the area.
You have cold weather, civil unrest.
Yeah, there's that too.
And Somalian childcare.
You guys have everything.
I thought we were gonna put up the bears today.
Take them to the Leering Center after the game.
Yeah, there's that.
My problem with it, no matter who's playing as I gamble on the sports.
Oh, do you?
Yeah, I put the, the commercials get me.
Have you heard some of the commercials?
Some of them, yeah, I mean, I just did one.
Well, that one, you know, you shout out, but some of them, they're like way too persuasive.
Okay.
It'll be something like, is your job a waste of time?
Is your family a waste of time?
Doing anything, just about anything can be a waste of time except for using the Vegas Corporates Mafia Sports Book app.
Hi, I'm Tom Garland.
You've never heard of me, but I've done stand up in bars with famous people.
So that means I know things.
Are you trying to find thrill in boring TV?
Are you trying to do something with your phone other than pornography?
We at Vegas Corporate Mafia Sports Book would like to help.
Let us provide you unnecessary extra stress in exchange
for your kids college fun, because at least when you feel on the brink of bankruptcy, you won't be feeling your balls.
You know, they have something that you can do.
It's called the Bada Bing Bada Boost.
Oh, Bada Bing, Bada Boost.
What's that?
Well, it gets you a little bit higher up on your pay scale.
You bet $5.
You get a Bada Bing, Bada Boost.
You get yourself $10 now.
Yeah, I've seen that.
There's like, the parlays are crazy.
It'll be like, like last night, it's like, you know, Steelers have to win on the money line.
You're like, OK.
And then you're like, Rogers has to throw for 200 yards.
You're like, all right.
And they're like, Rogers has to take the vaccine halfway.
And I think he's going to do
that.
I love that.
I mean, leave the gun, take the Caleb,
you
know.
All right.
So we got a top five Tuesday.
Yes.
These are top five things you cannot bet on, though.
People have been betting.
These are things they won't let you bet on.
But I think you should be able to top five things you cannot bet on, but should be able to during the NFL playoffs.
Number five, how many times a ref says after further review?
Yep.
I should be able to bet on that.
I
knew
they were going to say that.
Number four, the number of fans googling worst NFL playoff losses in history.
Oh, I think that hit a couple of times last night.
These are the top five things you cannot bet on but should be able to during the NFL playoffs.
Number three, how many swear words you can lip read during the broadcast?
Caleb, don't say that.
Pay your nails chill out man.
Yeah Top five things you cannot bet on but should be able to during the NFL playoffs number two the moment You realize the Vegas sports books already knew the outcome all along.
Oh Are you saying there's a controversy here?
I honestly I think the whole thing is a Psyop to be real with you the NFL you think it's not rigged
Yeah, I've said it before.
There's some games.
There's sometimes you see it and you're like, I actually, I think the whole thing is a government side up against the mouthguard industry.
I think they are trying to discredit mouthguards.
That's the entire, you see this, they just hang them like jewelry.
The guys got like six mouthguards on and you're like, Justin
Jefferson wears a lot of jewelry and every kiss begins with Jay, I guess.
These are the Minnesota cheerleaders are like put it in my mouth.
Oh boy.
I
like sweet potatoes.
Oh my gosh.
We got to finish it.
Top five things you cannot bet on but should be able to during the NFL playoffs.
Number one, which fan base will be saying next year the most?
Oh, you know, the Cubbies do that all the time.
Yeah, that's a Chicago thing.
It is.
But maybe there's something there for your team this year.
Maybe not, but maybe.
I
wouldn't bet on it.
Who used all the Wi-Fi?
Ah, apartment life.
Bad Wi-Fi, mystery laundry piles, and a roommate who says, I'll Venmo you.
Maybe 2027 deserves an upgrade.
Coming August 2027, Four Lakes Properties introduces the brand new Union Station apartments.
Furnished, in-unit washer and dryer, internet included, a great central downtown location, one to five bedroom apartments, and no double occupancy fees.
That's less adulting and more actually enjoying where you live.
Union Station apartments, now leasing from Four Lakes Properties.
Wait, we have a washer and dryer in the apartment?
apartment?
Who used all the Wi-Fi?
Ah, apartment life.
Bad Wi-Fi, mystery laundry piles, and a roommate who says, I'll Venmo you.
Maybe 2027 deserves an upgrade.
Coming August 2027, Four Lakes Properties introduces the brand new Union Station Apartments, furnished in-unit washer and dryer.
Internet included a great central downtown location, one to five bedroom apartments, and no double occupancy fees.
That's less adulting and more actually enjoying where you live.
Union Station Apartments, now leasing from Four Lakes Properties.
Wait, we have a washer and dryer in the apartment?
And
I could break the silence!
Basically, really?
Yeah, Johnny makes money so that he's He kept his money at least so all the guy, you know did shows with Steve Oh, you've talked about that.
Yeah,
bam Margera.
I did his nationwide rock tour I was on his I was hosting his rock band FF unstoppable with Cky and got people from Viking skull and gutter mouth and
that
thing and went all over the country Yeah, it was it was kind of my like almost famous.
I was like 22 at the time and it was just mind-blown
And and you know and so him Preston Lacey I was Preston Lacey's like comedy manager.
We went all over the country We did 40 states together me and the big boy Preston Lacey and then did some tours in Canada and recently not even that long ago Go a couple years ago a couple of them came to Cedar Rapids.
We man Dave England those guys and stuff So yeah, and then yeah tons of them.
I'm stoked to see that I mean obviously you've worked with the jackass guys, but you've never had a chance to meet
one of the members of my family.
No, I have not.
Nope.
In a way here, I'm going to introduce you to because there was a story here recently about a TikToker who decided to ride a horse into a target and then was, what do you mean?
Why are you calling the police?
Because the horse is crapping all over the floor.
That's kind of a jackass move, right?
You can't
ride the horse into the target and not say, hi, I'm Johnny Knoxville and welcome to, you
know.
What's funny is, is my uncle David had also brought a horse into Cedar Rapids Kennedy High School.
And there's always been this, this family story that I kind of believed because he's Uncle David.
So I figured that we'd bring him on board.
Uncle David, good morning.
Welcome to the Rockwell away morning show.
Good morning.
So let's, let's just get it out of the way.
Is the story true?
Yes, it is.
The horse goes into Kennedy.
Now, how do you, what, why is, what's going on?
Like what, what leads you to think that, okay, let's get a horse inside the school.
Well, I was trying to get credit so I could graduate early and I had to take elective courses.
And one of the elective courses was American literature.
And in American literature, the teacher wanted us to do the play Our Town.
Okay.
And I was going to play the part of the milkman.
And back in the day of our town, the milkman had a horse drawn milk wagon.
And the teacher told us we could bring any prop to school that we wanted.
I didn't really want to be in the play, but I figured it would be an excuse to bring a horse into the building.
You were the prop master.
Yes.
That's a job.
I like
that.
So our town.
You bring the horse to the school, uh, who's the first person that sees you and the horse together inside Cedar Rapids Kennedy?
I believe it was a substitute teacher teaching the American literature class that day.
All right.
Do you remember that?
What year do you think this was?
Uh, 71 or 72.
Did you own the horse?
No, it was a girl named Cheryl Postell.
If I can use their name.
Should we protect the
innocence,
Tom?
I
think we're past the statute
of
limitations on
that.
I think the year does matter though, Brian, because David, you do sound a little older.
I didn't know if at the time horse was the mode of transportation.
Kennedy's an old high school.
I can see that.
So here we are.
The horse is in the school.
Substitute teacher sees you.
Here it is, 1970, one-ish, two-ish.
Uh, what do you remember the first words out of the substitute teacher's mouth for?
Why do you have a horse in the classroom?
And when I realized it was a substitute teacher, I just said, you've got to help me hide this hide it.
This is why she was on her little
Intercom phoned at a principal.
So I had to remove the horse from the school and I had to do three days of in-school suspension, which for me was fine.
You just sat in the library reading books and magazines all day long and didn't have to go to classes.
So I have to figure that at some point during your three days of in school suspension, you're reading a lot of equestrian magazines, learning about horse care and such like
that.
No, I've been looking at micro films of the olden days.
I know it's funny as they're trying to remodel those schools right now.
They're trying to put tax incentives and remodel those schools.
I think that's what they should say at the next city council meeting.
They're like, the last time this school was remodeled, somebody had a horse in the hallway.
Well, that was the school was pretty new when that happened.
Uncle David, I tell you, I had always been told about this legendary story, and I never knew if it was true or not.
And now,
In front of the Rock 108 audience, you have said, yes, it is indeed true, and you have given me more fodder for the family.
And the horse did not get in
trouble.
Who used all the Wi-Fi?
Ah, apartment life.
Bad Wi-Fi, mystery laundry piles, and a roommate who says, I'll Venmo you.
Maybe 2027 deserves an upgrade.
Coming August 2027, Four Lakes Properties introduces the brand new Union Station Apartments.
Furnished, in-unit washer and dryer.
Internet included a great central downtown location, one to five bedroom apartments, and no double occupancy fees.
That's less adulting and more actually enjoying where you live.
Union Station Apartments, now leasing from Four Lakes Properties.
Wait, we have a washer and dryer in the apartment?
apartment?