4-8-25 Top 5 Signs We Are In A Recession

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That's the new one from Papa Roach, even if it kills me with Rock108's friend of the show, Tom Garland is here, morning.

Good morning, Brian.

Let me ask you this.

If you weren't in stand-up comedy, what are a couple of jobs that you just absolutely would not, even if they paid you great money, want to be a part of?

A funeral director.

Put that on the top of the list.

That sounds like so... Those guys, they make a lot of money, but that's just something where I don't think I could...

I think I would hit a point where I'm not sad anymore, either, when somebody would be like, my uncle died, and I'd be like, yep, come on, let's go, let's go, right through the turnstiles.

Yes, wild, upselling somebody on a more comfortable coffin.

Yeah, that would be crazy.

Police officer, throw that up there, wouldn't want to be a cop.

God bless him, but it's not for me.

There's a reason why, and it may not be the reason you're thinking.

I mean, being in the line of fire and that kind of such.

Sure.

How about the times where you have to show up to a residence and there are seven tigers on the property?

Tigers?

Yes, that's today's, you think you got it bad.

You think you got it bad.

Officer showed up in Nevada.

You know Nevada well.

The guy was arrested for illegally owning seven tigers on his property and claims

They were emotional support tigers, Tom.

Is this Tyson's

house?

It has to be Tyson, right?

No, it's not Tyson.

It's Nevada.

You've got the, ah, man.

I thought he was a pigeon dude.

No, Tyson, he had the tiger, dude.

He had a tiger in the hangover, right?

Yeah, but I guess he'd need six more.

Yes, but seven.

All right, take a listen to this guy.

It's not Tyson, I promise.

There are machine guns and there are Bearcats, Ram Lake, and none of that was necessary.

We have received information that he has been seen walking the tigers loose around the property, off the property in the desert.

There have been social media posts from him with people interacting with the cats, which is also in violation.

My tigers are my emotional support animals.

I rescued those tigers.

He rescued him Tom That's just that part's not true.

That's just you don't think so.

He just threw out Tiger King just to like First of all in Nevada like

If you're gonna have that many tigers, you have to be a magician.

You can't just not be doing magic.

And by the way, when they show up to take your tigers, that's your time to show off your skills as a magician.

Right?

You're like, oh, you want these tigers?

Look at that, they're frogs.

Are frogs illegal?

Boom.

Yeah.

So you don't want to be a cop.

But at this time, maybe a magician?

No, I don't want to be a magician either.

The other thing I wouldn't want to do is pizza delivery to this place with tigers.

Exactly.

Can you imagine?

Oh, just just hang on a second.

Well, my cats, you know, they're just they're friendly if you let them sniff you.

No.

Hey, we ordered the meat lovers.

Me and Tony and Tina over here really think you should bring that meat lovers over here.

Yeah.

You think you got it bad Tom Garland will have his top five coming up I Have to know is there a way that we can make money quickly

and I mean like a get rich quick scheme like do you know any pyramid schemes we can get involved in between you and me yeah it's

not radio I can probably tell you that call me out huh brother hey I'm just saying get rich quick I don't know we could maybe we could rob something this is we shouldn't discuss this on air I was gonna say that's not a pyramid scheme unless we're

robbing the pyramids yeah

oh you want a specific pyramid scheme

well I mean just something where we can can we get involved in a time share

Well, that'd be awesome, a Cedar Rapids timeshare.

You want a new box home that was just built?

We're gonna get it for you downtown.

Don't you want to get away from North Liberty?

Is vittin' too much for you?

Vacation to Cedar Rapids.

Yeah.

Bell playing too much.

Come on in to Cedar Rapids.

No.

Have you ever wanted to fish just directly into a river from a bridge?

Bottom feeders are ready for you.

I We need to figure out a some kind of money scheme man.

I'm broke.

Are you?

Yeah, I am and I feel like the whole world's going broke Brian the whole world This is it man.

This is if you've got money right now bury that stuff in the ground because we're I think we're headed into a recession today That's my top five top five signs.

It's happening.

We're in a recession top five signs We're in a recession.

I am bracing for impact.

All right number five

The ice cream truck only has one flavor right now and it's just ice.

They're not even trying anymore.

Number four, hookers have started offering pay what you can deals.

Oh.

Like they take it firm or whatever it is?

Just pay what you can, pay what you think is fair.

Just no negotiations, just put a little something in the, I wanted to say in the box and collection basket.

Oh, well either way.

No deposit, no return.

Number three, these are signs we're in a recession.

Number three, the Powerball jackpot winner gets millions of coupons.

Yes.

Number two, Tinder has redesigned the app to match people with credit cards.

Yeah.

You look like a Chase fella.

You've got a match.

Mastercard?

Not today.

You know how you can like set your age on the Tinder app?

Yeah.

Those credit cards will be, the interest rate is higher than your age.

Oh no.

Then you gotta freak out.

And number one this is the number one sign where you know we're in a recession Okay, you go on porn hub and you watch the casting couch and it's now just a beanbag chair from rena center Can't even afford the couch anymore pay what you can

Tom Garland is with us.

If you miss any of our top five Tuesdays, you can find them on Tom's Facebook page.

Tell

us how.

Yeah.

Social media, my Instagram too.

It's Tom Garland.

You'll find me out there if you Google it.

But yeah, we've been filming these now.

So that's maybe that's our get rich quick screen, Brian.

We got to go viral.

Got to go viral.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Just to have one of these pop.

Yeah.

Well, somebody will be like, did they just say porno on the radio?

And then that'll be it'll just go like crazy.

or the timeshare.

Maybe there's hashtag Cedar Rapids timeshare.

There you

go.

Hashtag Cedar Rapids.

It's right there.

Hashtag Cedar Rapids timeshare.

I love it.

Tom Garland is with us at 703.

This is a perfect song.

You're going down from the sick

puppies.

All the Wi-Fi!

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