Brian Marshall & The ROCK 108 Morning Show - "Stuttering John Melendez"

Dean Rockaway morning show getting even bigger today with our guest who's joining us He was on the Howard Stern show during the heyday stuttering John Melendez.

Hello.

Hey, man.

Thanks for

having me, Brian.

Thank you very much.

I'm very happy to be here,

man.

It's awesome because I was telling you off air.

It's kind of full circle for me.

I was an intern at a station in Minneapolis and the Howard Stern show was on that station rock on a hundred point three at the time.

Yeah.

So I'm a little radio nerd, you know, 110 pounds, you know, wet at

that

point.

And so there's a show twisted sister and slaughter that comes in.

They have you come in as the emcee and I'm stoked that you're coming in.

They bring you in.

they assure you upstairs.

I'm like, but John, I want to talk to John about his

interaction with Howard.

And then that's only the entire Howard team worked in the back of the day.

Yeah, they would come in and go.

Not me.

I would always tell people to come to the bar after.

Yeah,

I love to hang out and drink with everybody.

You know, that's still still to this day, even with my stand up shows.

After the show, I always say, hey, on stage, I go, hey, I'm going to go to this bar.

I'm going to go to the alehouse.

Come on down.

You know, and then I will just sit and tell stories of the old days, you know.

So

you were saying, first of all, there's a question begging to be asked.

Yeah.

No show.

Why are you and why are you and I?

I got a show

tonight.

Oh, you do?

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah.

I'm a double Z's.

Yes,

I'm doing

stand-up comedy at double Z's on 629 Elvis Boulevard, and it's a free show.

I thought you're just hanging with with the Z-man.

Oh, no, no, I mean, I mean, I've you know, I've had a great time here.

You know, I love the people of Iowa.

I'm not just, you know, you know, trying to, you know, patronize people.

No, I'm not.

It's just that everyone is so

It was so nice here.

It's like, you

know, I was nice.

I was nice.

Don't forget, you know, I grew up in New York.

It's like, hey, I'm talking

here.

So I know I'm I'm East Coast myself and they don't understand the aggressiveness sometimes.

Oh, no.

You know, a New Yorker

is just like, oh, man.

I

mean, we look at it as a sign of love and, you know, canoodling with each other.

They look at it as aggressive

jerk.

Well, like, you know, even when I grew up, it was all we did was goof on each other's bombs.

You know, it was always about your mother, you know?

You know, like, you know, like even when you were in second, third grade, hey, your mother wears combat boots, you know?

It was always goofing on people's mothers.

It was like.

But that was what you did.

How did you get involved with Howard?

Cause everybody tries to get involved with the Howard show, especially back in the day.

How did you get involved?

I was

going to New York university and a friend of mine, Mitch Faitel, who happens to be a really good comic.

He was interning at Howard and I said, Hey man,

If you ever leave, please hook me up and thank God he got into a major car accident.

And he told his car and he couldn't do it anymore.

His father was sick of him not getting paid.

So then he told Howard, he said, there's only one problem.

Just John Guy, he stutters and Howard goes, he stutters, hire him.

So that was it.

And then I just, and then no one knew that I had no problem asking celebrities questions because that was me when I was in junior high.

I

was

always asking because I have no problem asking anybody anything.

So.

It was a perfect fit, you know, just me stuttering and asking questions because celebrities would hang in there.

Sometimes they felt bad because I had a stutter.

So they didn't want to, like, you know, walk away from somebody's stutter.

So some celebrities didn't care, like, you know, Lou Reed.

I got punched in the nose by Raquel Wells for asking her are they drooping yet?

She hit me with the left one and then

I asked O.J.

Simpson if he would sign my knife.

Oh, gosh.

Yes.

And coincidentally, he had his own.

But the best response I ever got was from the late great Joan Rivers, who was a friend.

And, you know, she was so funny.

Without skipping a beat, I said, Joan, do you think ugly people should be allowed to have children?

She said, no.

And I told your mother that.

She was very quick.

Yeah, she's really sharp.

So, but yeah, I mean, it's, you know, it was really like a crazy time in the Stern Show.

It was the golden era of that show, you know?

I mean, when I started, we were only on in New York and Philly.

Yeah.

And then, and then by the time I left, we were on like 80 markets, you know, all over the country.

So,

and the

issue was even getting played in England.

Yeah.

It's funny how it turned into an FCC thing, and they had a button to silence Howard.

And I interviewed for the program director's job there with Tom Ciasano, the general manager.

Tom Ciasano.

Yes.

And they sent me into his office to wait for him, and he walked in, and I was on my feet, kind of wandering around the office, and he introduced himself.

And I was looking around, I said, where is it?

And he said, where's what?

And I said, the button.

During a job interview and he said we don't talk about the button

The button was actually a few doors down from the studio, but man did that drive.

How are we crazy man did what who manned to the button Tom

oh he will show

you

what i'ma get in super early he's a program i mean he's he's a general manager

yeah yeah

and he'd get in there and if Howard said anything he thought was you know somewhat FCC non-friendly he would hit the button and that would erase like

30 seconds.

Oh my gosh.

And Howard would go ballistic.

You know, I mean, it was fun to watch.

But yeah, I mean, that whole that whole time was a great, great experience for me.

I mean, you know, I mean, I mean, just think of the tail.

Why did he

have?

Why did you?

Why did you all have such a hard on for Andy Bloom down in Philly?

Well, I didn't have a, I didn't have a hard arm for him.

He just, you know, he'd get me a lot of gigs in Philly.

He was kind of pompous in a way.

He was the

program director of the Philly station.

Yeah, he's got a big, he's his biggest fan,

right?

Oh yeah, and you know, hey, all you guys could come down to my house and barbecue and I'll make, you know, throw up some beer and brats,

man.

Shut

up, come here.

John Melinda, stuttering John from the Howard Stern Show and also the Tonight Show with Jay Leno.

Yes.

And I dug into my personal stash and the man came on south of his side.

Can you

imagine the Tonight Show hired me?

Yes.

They hired me to be the announcer.

They hire a stutterer.

When

did that

happen?

To be the announcer on the Tonight Show.

That's like hiring Charlie Sheen to watch your coke.

When were you the announcer?

I was the announcer from 2004 to 2009, and I stayed on as a writer till Jay left in 2014.

I did not

know this.

Oh, yeah.

No, I did not.

Wow.

Yeah.

It's amazing.

And there's a story to tell behind it, but I also wanted to play for you, Russ.

Stuttering John had an album in 1994, self-titled.

There

is a

song that you will love because it's called Get Off My Lawn.

We're going to play it for you next on Rock 108.

I found the song for your

show, Russ.

Yeah, Suttering John, Get Off My Lawn here on Rock 108.

Now I'm here with Brian Marshall.

I

will tell you, if you had added the word, you bastard, on the end of that, it would have sold a lot more.

Yeah, yeah, that song is actually a metaphor like, you know, for a girl is trying to change me, you know, like it was just like, you know, I'll get out of my head, you know, just leave me alone.

I'm never going to change this.

You know, it's so funny, you know, because, you know, I remember I was in Tom Chiesano's office, you know, the general manager and Steve Kingston was the program director.

And and I was asking for more money.

And they go, they go, you know, where are you going to go?

And they go, look.

Howard created you.

And I go, no, no, no, years and years of bad parenting had nothing to do with Howard.

But

they would say that to you in a

negotiation.

Oh, my God.

Tom Chisano was dying of cancer.

And I and I was making 42,000 a year.

Oh, my God.

And I said,

yes.

And I said, Tom, you know, I like to get 50 grand a year.

And he just said, gentlemen, I'll die of cancer before I pay

you.

Oh, my God.

Yes, I know.

I know.

No, it's just we know how radio is.

I mean, it's just but they none of us made money.

I mean, it was so sad.

I'd be I'd be standing.

behind Baba Booey as he's doing like, you know, strip club appearances.

And I'm like, this is the, this is the producer of the biggest radio

show.

Even Gary wasn't making money.

No, Gary wasn't making anything either.

You know, the only people making money was Howard and Robin and then Fred and Jackie.

That was it.

I thought Howard paid everybody out of his salary.

No,

are you kidding me?

No way.

And Howard wanted nothing to do with our salaries.

Like even when I was asked for eight hours, I go, Howard, could you help me out?

He didn't help me out.

Really?

Yeah.

So

he wouldn't go talk to him, say, I don't know for you and say, look, you gotta.

No, no.

In fact, this is the funniest thing.

Howard was goofing on us all for our Christmas gifts to him.

And I gave him like, like a whole basket of like DVDs that I knew he would like.

Oh yeah.

Like she's doing great movies and books, like top selling books.

And then he's goofing on us.

So, you know, me, I always had the balls to say anything.

So I went in there and went, Howard,

Do you know what you gave us for Christmas?

I got a canister a canister full of popcorn with three flavors cheddar caramel and regular I go Howard I stuck my arm into the canister and to the bottom and hope to find the check at the bottom of the cracker jack box and then and then

I get out of the studio and Gange, who was another guy in there, he goes, John, I did the same thing.

I stuck my hand.

I thought there had to be a check.

And it's such a juxtaposition because when you work with Jay Leno, Jay would give us.

3000 5000 like like cash bonuses on Christmas.

Oh my god, you know, and and and Jay had 150 employees.

Yeah, everybody got a check that show is that big?

Yeah, everybody

got a

check.

Did you reach out to Jay after his recent accident?

Yeah, I emailed them.

Yeah.

Yeah.

He he looked like he's doing okay, but I mean obviously got hurt pretty bad.

Yeah.

Yep.

Yeah, you know, he burned

this chin, you know

Yeah, I

know that's like a mile long But you know, you know, I see that you have Ozzy's album diary of a madman Yeah, and and it was funny because I have so many great stories about Ozzy and

Well, the first one I'll tell you was Ozzy and Howard pulled the greatest, greatest prank on me.

I was on the air and, you know, Howard had Ozzy on the phone.

And, you know, and, and it was right when that album, you know, that you just played had come out and.

Ozzie said, yeah,

yeah, yeah, yeah, I want to, you know, I've got that starting John

open for us at Jones Beach.

And I'm like, really?

Howard goes, wow, John, are you gonna open for Ozzie?

And I'm like, whoa.

Yeah.

And then Ozzie goes, yes, yes, yes.

I love your songs.

I listened to your album.

I loved, you know, I loved Plush and Sex Type Thing and Wicked Garden.

And I'm going,

Ozzy, that's Stone Temple Pilots.

And he goes, oh, forget it.

You don't have to open up.

And

I was like, that was a great prank.

But I'll tell you, I ended up opening up for Ozzy.

And I have two great stories.

Because we were there.

I'm with my band.

I wrote my friend as a big Ozzy fan.

And we're in the dressing room.

Hanging out with Ozzy, smoking weed, you know, just, you know, drinking beer and it was great.

And my friend is video, you know, and, you know, he's using my video camera and his videotape and the whole thing.

Cut to a week later, I invite my friends over to come watch me hanging out with Ozzy in the green room.

And we put the videotape on and then up comes my kid on a swing.

My wife erased the whole video and taped my kid on a swing But the other funny thing is when I'm at this and I hate to do this, but it's just become now it's kind of everyone knows it But and it's kind of this is really funny.

But while Ozzy's on stage, you know, I climb up the rafters in Jones Beach So I'm on the side of the stage and I see this black curtain and I go what the hell's that so

I pull the curtain and there's a guy with a microphone singing all Ozzy's lyrics.

So Ozzy's got someone with like an Ozzy voice to double him in case Ozzy's voice cracks.

So this guy is essentially singing and everybody in the crowd thinks it's Ozzy, but no, it's this guy.

So when I open the curtain, the guy's like,

Shut that curtain.

Shut that curtain.

It literally was the wisdom of us.

Yes.

Yes.

I swear to God, it's a true story.

And then the last funny one.

Pay no attention to the man behind

the curtain.

Yes.

Yes.

And then the last great one is, is, so Ozzie Sharon, Howard and Beth, and me and Susanna, that was my wife.

We were at Nobu eating dinner.

And Nobu is like a zen place, you know?

Sure.

In the bathroom, they play the sound of the ocean.

Okay.

So, so, you know, so we're all sitting, you know, having dinner, whatever, and Ozzy goes, I got a bathroom.

And, and he gets up and he goes to the bathroom.

And, and he doesn't come back.

And it's like, like a half an hour.

And we're like, where's

all, it sounds like, where's Ozzy?

And we're all wondering.

Finally, Ozzy comes back.

Well, like, Ozzy, what happened to you?

He goes,

I, you know, I kept hitting the ocean.

So, so I went and got a chair and, and I looked out the window to the bathroom.

I don't see any ocean.

We're like, Ozzy, that's a tape.

We're not next to the ocean.

Oh

my God.

Senator John Melendez with us here on the Rock 108 morning show.

He's got a free show tonight at the double Z 629 Ellis in Cedar Rapids.

It starts at eight o'clock tonight.

What?

Wait.

Free show so come on down guys.

Are you gonna come?

I'm looking forward to it.

Yeah.

Yeah, sure.

Oh definitely come

I I talk about everything you know stern jokes all my interviews I talk about mawage

and childbirth and childrearing and what it's like to get old and all that

and

like everything.

I know that there's gotta be some more stories and we'll get them here in just a few.

We will have the man behind the curtain in just a moment.

Can

we post the information on our Facebook page so people can figure out how to get there and where it's at?

Pop it up here as we get into

it.

The double Z insult word.

Yes, and if you can't make it to the double Z tonight, I'm gonna be at the daiquiri factory in Davenport on Saturday night awesome

We've

gotta

find out what the heck's going on Ozzie's up next

Rock 108 locally owned by a woman named Mary