Transcript — Free Day Saturday

What up, Matt Town? It's your girl, Brandi Grayson on 92.7 FM. It is Saturday. I think

it's Saturday. It might be Thursday. Who knows? But it's Saturday. And we up in here,

located off State Street. I'm in the house with two of one of my, I said two of one of

my, okay, two of one of my friends. You know what? I've been the studio with two of many,

wait, two of my favorite people. April Kengega. If you guys remember her, she's been on the

show before. On the one time though. Yes, she'll be all right. She's all right. She's in her

fillings. If you know anything about April, she's very, very sensitive. So when she's talking

and very petty and you just got to look away. But she's not like that on her seat, only

as your friend, okay? So, but she says County Board of Supervisors, but she's not like

that as a supervisor at all. And then we have, Kenna, Kenna are one of our favorite people

that show up every week. And that's why April's really mad because we're here every week.

Because I don't get invited. And the reason I invite Kenna every week, because I don't

have to invite nobody else. If you think about it, it's like you coming or not. So that's

right. And she's the owner of Rougey Wellness. And she does all kind of beautiful wellness

and self-care things, including yoga, working out, eating right, coaching all that good stuff

in her world. And I, Brandi Grayson, CEO, founder of Urban Triage. So we got Black Girl

Magic today on this Saturday. We're we're drawing close to the end of black history month.

So it just makes sense that we hear together being black and beautiful and all that. And

what we're going to talk about today, who knows? I decided today is free day Saturday,

which means, you know, kind of spending all free, dumb day, but free day. Yeah, that makes

sense. Okay. I just made that up in this whole moment, but that's what we're going to

do. Oh, and you know what else I want to mention that I am doing stand-up comedy tonight

because it's Saturday. Where can we see you tonight? We're doing stand-up comedy tonight.

I'm going to be at the Will Mar Center. Is that what it's called? Will Mar? Will Mar

Center. So I used to do stand-up back in a day. And I think Antoine asked me to do the

stand-up because you know, Antoine, he didn't really like me for real, but he did ask me

to come and do the stand-up. And I thought like, yeah, let me do it because I haven't been

on stage and his black history. And maybe he'll get some extra sales because now, you know,

my whole team is coming. So I mean, that's some extra sales. And you guys should just come

and laugh just so I don't feel crazy. If I'm not funny, because then my friends could

just laugh at me anyway. And be like, girl, you so funny because that's what it's about.

So come out, support is at the Will Mar Center. I think the show starts at seven. My set will

literally be like five minutes, but y'all should come anyway. Is there a cover? I think

so. I think, and no, I don't get paid. Wait, I should have negotiated some fees around

here. 5% or something. Can I get 5%? Everybody that say Brandy Gray, I'm coming to see her.

I should get like five out of cold, a ticket code or something, right? Okay. I'm going

to remember that next time. I'm just going to cry. I'll just be to let people use me.

I'm just quitting. And it's why I'm probably on Facebook like, girl. You asked me comedy

nothing. Okay. So today is free day. We're just going to talk about random stuff. But check

us out. Check me out at the comedy show on Saturday. So beautiful black women. What do we have

to talk about? Before we start talking, I was talking about my son. If you guys want to

continue to talk about my son, that's good. But do you want to talk about your son? No.

Okay. So I googled this black people. Okay. That's good. The number one said black Americans

are more likely than other racial and ethnic groups in the US to get their news on TV.

And now we know that I know to be like anything pretty much because I don't remember people

celebrating all the black excellence in Madison, Wisconsin. That's taking place. There's plenty

of black news happening that I don't see. Okay. So we're the number one population that

will be showcased in negative news, showcased in criminalization or any negative fact. That's

true because if you ever watch Madison news channel 27 or Fox to be exact, I'm not going

to say MB 15 because I like them. But like Fox news, you'll see like every report is about

black people. And they didn't even have me black people here. Yeah. Can we talk about

this? Please? And can we also just point out the fact that Madison has high crime rate

in a downtown area? Who do you think is committing the crimes downtown? White people might

be. Because I don't see who almost cut away. We can't. We almost said the A word. Okay.

Sorry Nate to my producer. I was like that. It was coming. Right. It was I found myself

like, Oh, I saw a new face. So but they're the they commit the most crimes. But we don't

see them on TV. Why? Do they even do they do they even have consequences for what they

be doing down here? No, I know consequences. These folks be out here doing. But you know,

the police do show up on state street in Madison when there's a lot of black kids and black

kids do come out a lot now because we didn't used to hang out on state street like that

when I was growing up. But they come down here deep. Have you all been out here at night?

No, no. I mean, whenever there's a TK. Right. You don't come to every day street. That's

like on the Capitol, right? Right. Madlet is the time. Yeah. That's true. Rob D's. Okay.

Rob D's in the house. Madlet, check us out in some time. I said, I was like, it's me,

but it's a new partnership. No, just us meeting black folks. Okay. Yeah. Cause you know,

we kind of group ourselves together. So, um, yeah, whatever I was just ramming about,

but downtown, uh, most of the crimes committed down here are by white folks, but we don't see

them on TV. So number one TV shows or TV news stuff is about black people. That's interesting.

But they get mad when we want to talk about all the positive stuff we do during the,

the small 28 days we have with them. Oh, this, you know, 29 days. We might as well

have taken extra one and give ourselves 30 days. Just March. First, we're now declaring

February 30th. Yeah. I'm with it. That's a Friday period. Yeah. Let's do it. Okay. What

else can we talk about? I did. And it was, and I think it's pretty political because the

book that you guys are reading is by bail hooks. Yeah. One of my, what are meeting this week?

This past week. Yeah. And what's the book? So we read, um, all about love for February.

Oh, okay. January, we read, braiding sweet grass. Okay. Um, for March, we're reading a book

called, um, cast by Isabel Wilkerson. Have y'all heard of that? No, about the Indian,

or it's, I don't know, I don't know. Is it about black people? I think it's about, so it's,

it's the, so it's the origins of our disc. The origins, the cast system. It is. I think,

that's what I think. I mean, we just, we just had a book club on Wednesday, today, today,

a Saturday. Okay. Okay. So, um, couple days ago. So it's, yeah, a few days ago. Um, but

the, here's the, the, um, low, low, low, it says in the latest book, cast the origin of our disc

contents Wilkerson prize, open the lid on this country's racism and exposes the underlying truth

that from the beginning, America has created a cast society, whites on top, those of African descent

on the bottom. But what, what, I mean, we all know that, you know, like, is this like, um, like,

who to explore? Uh, okay, we let you read it. Yeah. I will report back. I will report back

because, um, I'm going to read the book. Okay. For March. For March. I want to join your book

about, I would never read it though. No, you know, people came who didn't read it this month. Okay.

And it was amazing. Like, listening to people talk about the book who read it and like,

if somebody says, well, I didn't read the book. So, you know, tell me about it. And so it was

really, really cool. Like, even seeing the conversation and the way that we were bringing people

into the book. And then, um, listening to people share the stories about how their understanding

and analysis of love had been shaped and things that resonated with them and the things that they

realized about themselves when reading the book. And your book club is pretty diverse too,

which is nice, right? Because you got black men, black women, you got others in the space, which

also brings another deaf. Yeah. It was, it was really interesting because there was people from,

yeah, different backgrounds, black, white, uh, not black or white. Um, we had people from educational

backgrounds. We had people who was parents, people who was not parents. Like people, um, of so many

different, like, lives. Right. That's cool. So it brought so much, you know, like, yeah,

depth to the conversations. That's cool. And then it was amazing because with all of those

different, you know, backgrounds, we were able to find different ways to connect and resonate.

So beautiful. I can't you can create all these beautiful communities. Yeah. Thank you. She

rocking. See, that's what you do. I don't see that on the news. But we're all about that.

Yes. Oh, couples yoga. Oh, couples. Yeah. The couples yoga. The next one is coming up. I

want to tell you all about that. I'm going to tell you all about it. Let me let you all know how

we went. Okay. Cause I have one, um, in this month. And so the next one's coming up March the 9th

and 30th. Okay. And so it was really amazing and couples yoga. Like because I always assume that

people are not that at least one person in the partner. Yeah. Is not going to have any experience.

Right. So I already planned that out. And so it was the night of romance, fun, intimacy,

connection. So it was really amazing seeing the way that the partners were so focused and intent

on one another. And we, you know, everybody took turns like with on with that within their,

you know, each group. Right. Partnership. Everybody took turns like giving and receiving.

And it was really amazing. Like giving and receiving and the giving and the yoga. But I'm saying

like yoga. So they weren't doing it together. So they were. So it's like, so there was some things

that you do together. And then there was some times when it was like, I'm going to roll your

nose. Yeah. There was, you know, like part of, you know, part of people think that yoga is just

doing poses, but there's an intimacy. There's a sensuality part. So what kind of, yeah, but not,

you know, yeah. But see this is about. This is about. So this is about comfort communication.

Right. So we did do like, there was this one that, you know, like we did, we were like on our

bellies. And then our partner was like, you know, lift you up like this. But then it's the

communication. Like to the point of your constant pulling on me. It wasn't. It's just like,

how is this how to just to find what your edges. But then there was a point where the partner,

there was a part where the partner would like give a massage, a back rub. You have you ever

got a massage and it never was actually fulfilled the massage. Yeah. It did get a

lot of times, right? Yeah. Because they've been doing too much. Right. And then you should

see how they were so focused. Like when I gave them the instructions, they was taking it so,

like they wanted to make sure their partner was satisfied. Okay. Well, we'll have the comments.

How much is that? 55 per couple. And I had a T bar. I had some snacks. I had chocolate covers.

I made some chocolate covered strawberries for this one. Next one, I had some other ideas.

And I had a T bar. So they was drinking their tea. They were, you know, things to make you relax

and calm. So when is the next one? March the ninth. And then, um, then the other one after that

is like two weeks later, I marched the 30th and then April 9th. So, I mean, March 9th, March 30th

and then April 20th. Okay. All that black girl magic up in there. That's your birthday. Where's your

birthday? Oh, when is my birthday? Yeah. Oh, Lord, I'm about to get cussed out again. The 20th

is April. Oh, no, no, I am birthday. It's March the 20th. No, it's April. I think we got to go

to commercial. My started one of these days. Wow. Who knows one of them. Let's keep

up. Folks who are just tuning in. You're listening to 92.7 FM. The Black Convergence Show,

what we're talking about. Who knows is free day for Black History. We'll be back in a minute.

Oh, you can't take my power from me. I rise, we rise, rise, the light for the world's

sea. The spring is skiing says the snow. My windows, I am already

What up, bad town. You're listening to your girl Brandy Grayson. Oh, my goodness. I got something in my throat.

Sorry, on 92.7 FM. It's the all over show, the Black Convergence Show, where we talk about anything,

everything, whenever we want. However, we want to date is free, dumb day, free day to talk about

whatever we want. So we're just free in that. Before we went on break, we was just talking about

whatever we wanted. So we're going to continue that trend. But something that popped up in my head

when we went on break is that there's just been a lot of sad stuff happening, you know,

like in our in our community, our local community. And one of the things we were discussing was the

murder of a family. I think it was like a family of three, three people were killed. One person

was injured and it's just really sad. And we don't have any further details than that. Then what the

news has released, just the names and the mother literally murdered two of her children and injured,

injured one. I think was the father to children. I don't know. I'm just gossiping at this point.

Oh, it's news. Okay. So on news, it said, oh, it went away. Okay. When you look at the phone,

it says, you need to pay three months to access this article. It did, but now it's back.

No, $1 for three months. So we good. It's good. I don't know what the story says because we need

$3. Let's try this one. So a middle to woman. Okay. Here we go. It says a woman shot and killed her

children before turning the gun on herself Sunday night, according to news released from middle

to police and released state of the 34 year old woman shot her family members with a handgun

inside an apartment on Maywood Avenue. The report comes after middle 10 police captain Tyler,

I can't say his name. Leo third said three people were found dead and another man was shot

multiple times. Dang, a 31 year old male was struck by gunfire fire multiple times as he

exited the residents. Two children, an eight year old female and a five year old boy were struck

and killed by the gunfire. He said the woman, the mother, the children, then turned the gun

on herself and ended her own life. This domestic violence has no place in our community. So that's the,

the police talking. But let's just talk about for a second. And we don't know. I don't know who

the woman is. I don't know the names. I didn't read further down. But can we please just talk about

the stress and what is happening all across not just in our city and our county, but all across

the country. People are suffering real bad. And as a nonprofit leader in our local community,

urban triage, we see a lot of it. We see a lot of domestic violence. We see a lot of children

being placed in child protective services. We see families coming to our office who are so stressed

that they talk about ending their lives. And in part of this, I think as a society that we

continuously fail, we just fail. So I'm just going to open up with to y'all and let my co-host,

April Kageya and Kena share their thoughts around what's happening in our community. And not

just locally, but across the country that's leading to people feeling very desperate and hopeless.

And suicide rates are skyrocketing, especially for black boys and black children and domestic

violence is skyrocketing. So there's something that's not working. I think, I mean, number one is

the lack of resources and support. And especially in the black community, we have this negative

connotation, but Brandon, I think you've done a really good job about being open about you going

to therapy, but there's a negative connotation that we shouldn't ask for help. Like even me personally,

like it's very hard for me to ask for help. And I think we're ashamed of reaching out to someone.

And so there's so many things that are internalized with specifically with black women that we

carry a lot, you know, ancestry and then within our lives. And a lot of us are single mothers. And

you know, there's just so much that we have to carry that. I think sometimes it just gets to be

too much. Yeah. And then you think about like the shame, like I saw something online articulated

earlier this week about how by the time that you get to the point to where you realize you need help

and you can't do this by yourself, like by the time that you've stopped trying to juggle everything

on your own, then you realize you need help. And then, you know, like if you're in a small community,

sometimes even going out to ask for help feels scary because you're like, this is this is a small

town is people going to talk about me. So then it's the shame that people deal with when they

be worried about what are they? Are they going to judge me? And they ain't wrong, though, because that's

the kind of community we live in like country or city or society. I had I was over listening.

I was over here in a story the other day about a young lady, probably our age, my age that had

literally had a nervous breakdown. She already wasn't doing well emotionally and mentally. And she

was struggling. It's her first time being a mom, but she was an older mom, you know what I mean?

Like, so she's never had any kids. She doesn't have any parents. She doesn't have any siblings.

She doesn't have a partner. And she was living, you know, at the YWCA working every day,

trying to get herself, you know, in a good place. And then she got in a car accident. And then

the car accident, you know, totaled the car. And then she couldn't get back and forth. And then

she had like this stress response to it like PTSD. And she was able to get another car. But then

she kept having these mental break like these panic attacks. And like like it's just it was

no good. Whatever was happening with her before was exacerbated after the accident. And she had

this little baby. And then she went to church. And she asked the church folks to help her to keep it.

Then to make a long story short, they end up calling a police on her. Yeah, because there

there was like one person had the baby. And then they got mad and they gave the baby to somebody else.

And that person they gave the baby to end up calling the police that police ended up showing up to

her house. And it was like, we end up doing the things that people are afraid of for us to do

when you call for help. And I think that's the problem because the problem is not the fear.

It's the society that we live in where we think the only way to help people is through calling the

police. And for black people, when you call the police, you actually put them in a more dangerous

situation. You get you put them in a situation to have their child taken away from them. And you

put them in a situation where they could be murdered and killed by the police. And like in

sometimes even church people, we in black and I grew up in a in a world where church was the

place you went for help, but actually church can be very harmful for people nowadays and very

triggering. So it's like, so what do we need to do in our individual networks in our own

communities? Because we can't go to the systems and expect the systems to save us. Whether it's the

police department of human services, those are those systems are not for us at all. And churches

are not for us. It's not safe. It's not safe. Like you you don't even know like when you're going

through like the intake and the questionnaire, you don't even know the right things to say. Because

if you're honest, you come to our community. We got you. We got you. We're going to walk you through.

They're going to be like, we got you. Come through. Are you sure? We got you. We ain't, we ain't

them. We got you. Okay. And that's why they mad at us now. Record that. Okay. So it's like,

you know, like you go, you be going through the questionnaire and then they be asking you the

questions. And you be like, if I answer this, am I going to get the help? Or am I going to

right? Right. And I'm going to lose. I think about you know what vision I keep having in my mind

since yesterday is I cannot remember what the movie was. Y'all probably will know when I tell

you this, this, this, this, the picture. But it was when the woman, the woman was so afraid. She had

a flashback. And she ended up on a live in her child. Because she thought that somebody was

about to take her baby. And so you know, like I think about how like with the violence, the violence

that we was raised on. Yeah. Where our parents would be like, I got to, I'm going to do this so

that because so that the world doesn't do this to you. Right. Right. And that's harmful. Yeah.

It is. And it's fear. Mm-hmm. But and then I just think about that that moment and that movie

where she did that to her own baby. Yeah. I kind of do. But it's almost like she unlived her

kiss. She, she has so much love for her kid that she didn't want anyone else to hurt her

them and felt like the only way out to keep them safe. To keep them safe was on a live. Rather than

to let them not be with her. Yeah. That's crazy. And yeah. So you're listening to 92.7 FM

on the black conversion show. We're talking about, we're just talking about the situation that

happened in the middle 10, where a young woman unalived her children and attempted to unalive

her partner or her kid's father. And he's well, you know, he got away, but he's not going to be well

mentally and emotionally. And we're just talking about the consequences of living in today's

society. So anyway, you're listening to Brandy Grayson on 92.7 FM stay tuned. We'll be back in a

little while.

And on the back emergent show with my co-host sis, April Kagea and Kenna, I always say,

why was it your whole name?

Because I feel like your name has to be sent out of the whole name.

Because the name might not recognize you or something.

Because it's just April.

April name.

I don't know, but April Kagea.

Before we went on break, we were just talking about the really tragic situation

that happened locally in Middleton with the murder or the Unliving.

Could you tell us Kenna, why we say on live versus murder?

I think maybe for like since.

Yeah, they're like, they do that.

You say what?

You got it on TikTok.

You have to say on live.

Yeah, I think it's a trigger.

If you say the other word, it's very triggering for people.

Okay, so on the live.

And also because people, I'll tell you I was in a talk one time.

And depending on the way that it happened.

Whether it was self-inflicted or external.

Right.

It also gives listeners a perspective that might put them into the shoes of that position.

I get it.

And I also be feeling like, dang, we can't say nothing.

And then you'd be like, dang, I don't even, did I say the right thing?

Did I have the right word?

Did I go to the right class or listen to the right newscast?

I don't know.

I've heard people say that to me, even.

And my thing is, it's just do your best.

Everybody just always do your best.

Because it's just like darn it.

Like, I mean, I don't know.

I'm not going to get into it because then y'all going to be, you know, sending me hate.

Everybody goes like that probably.

Girl Brandy says that means she hate all people.

You know, urban triage.

We really do center the voices and the needs of people known as black and families.

And based on that, people will be like, they don't, they don't serve white people.

And then today, someone stopped in to visit from actually Nia Maya.

Another organization, nonprofit organization.

They's like, I've never been here.

And we were walking and we thought we'd stop in.

And of course, they stopped in and the seven white people sitting at our table

getting services.

And they're going to say, I didn't know y'all helped that.

I said, we help everybody that need housing services.

But where else are you going to go?

Right?

Like, urban triage is it for the most part.

We do have our partner agencies like tenant resources.

They specialize in like eviction prevention services.

Like, they'll go to court with you and things like that.

We specialize in helping people navigate the system.

Because one of the things you meant to be for is like, people ask you these questions.

But they don't, you don't even know which way you supposed to be asking.

Should I tell the truth or not the truth?

I don't know if you're going to harm me or what do I emphasize?

So part of our work at urban triage is to make sure people understand the rules of eligibility

and what the next steps are and how we can assist them.

Yeah.

So, um, yeah.

So anyway, we're just out here talking about free day, free day to talk about whatever the free we want to talk about today.

Talking about right before we came back on the movie.

Right.

The movie.

It was the love of the series.

I didn't tell you.

Oh, yeah, something about 50.

Oh, 50.

Oh, Raisin Kane.

What was that?

Was that what you called it?

Kane, Raisin.

You said raise the cane.

Really?

You said it.

Oh, can you raise the cane?

Raisin the cane.

Because what shows were you watching?

I was like, I'm raising the cane.

Wait.

Raisin can.

No cane.

Oh, okay.

Raisin can.

No cane.

Oh, okay.

Raisin can.

I don't know.

Anyway.

Anyway, that's what I'm watching on stars.

And you were saying that you were watching something else.

I was watching TikTok series.

Who T.F. did I marry?

Did you see that name?

Did you like that?

But first of all, TikTok got shot.

I have not seen it.

Oh, now I'm saying, did you see how I said who T.F.?

Oh.

But who knew that TikTok made series though?

They don't.

So this woman just did like a 50-part story time.

Oh, that's what my staff was talking today about how she met somebody.

And then she married him.

Then he moved in after two and a half weeks.

We got pregnant.

It was like a whole Jerry Springer thing.

It was very intense.

It was real.

Yeah.

So she married this dude who led this whole fake life.

He said he was like vice president, but he was a forklift driver.

We really got to do better.

We got to do better on who we choose.

I was listening to her whole story.

And I was like, you know what?

Any of us could have been cis.

And the circumstances, it was COVID.

First of all, since a lot of us was cis.

Right.

Not good at them.

But a lot of us think we just ain't telling the story.

Right.

I didn't tell them the same thing.

But any of us, many of us thought she started her story.

Listen.

I see me.

And I see what she was saying.

Okay.

You ain't lie.

But it's sure it's entertaining watching someone else suffer.

So she was very trans.

Like the thing, the thing is like that.

I feel like everybody has to respect her in her position.

Because she said, I'm going to be honest and transparent.

Even if it makes me not look good.

Yeah.

Even if y'all think I'm dumb.

Because I just want to make one person just know what's going on

so that they can open up and open their eyes and see.

Yeah.

So that they can get out if this is them.

But you don't think she's doing it for cloud.

Because I ticked out how many views they get.

So it did get millions of views.

And she's going to Paris.

Okay.

And she got to be.

I think we need to be vulnerable.

But here's the thing.

This was why it happened.

Because she was like answering a question.

She answered a prompt.

And then it caused so much interest.

Right.

That she was like, well, I'll just make it.

I'll just make a series.

See, y'all need to go ahead and call the enough interest.

So we can make a series.

Yeah.

And tell our stories.

What stories should we tell?

Well, I mean, we're going to talk about relationships.

Relationships always get the most.

That's what people like most talk about.

Because we all can relate.

And let's try to figure out relationships.

Well, that and that's what I teach when I'm like,

do our curriculum and our transformative education.

I always use relationships because everybody,

you're in relationships.

You can relate.

You can relate to the parts of you that you know you have no things.

You know you have no business doing.

And the parts of you that show up.

That's toxic.

That adds to the toxicity and interaction.

So I don't know if y'all want to share any y'all.

Maybe we could go viral.

Y'all got any juice.

Everyone like, now my girls didn't be happy.

See, are you telling me this?

Look at that.

She's on a couch.

I want to say too much.

She took her handphone after.

Look, she's okay.

No sense of machine famous.

So, one of the things I think I want to talk about

is the importance of everybody going to therapy in relationships

because to think about what she would get me like that.

Because I'm a therapist.

Are you a therapist?

I'm a therapist.

Right.

But I'm not.

But, you know, she wasn't.

She was.

I wasn't that.

You told me you're going to give me your therapist name.

Oh girl, I got you.

Her name is Heather lass and let me tell y'all some.

Y'all better stop calling my therapist because y'all be booking up her sights

when I need to change my appointment.

She'd be like, when's all your friends?

See the system still?

So yeah.

Girl.

But I'm y'all get y'all fad with her name.

Because I, just in case mind you.

Heather lasts.

She isn't like a regular psychotherapy.

What kind of, she was her specialty.

Her, her name of her company is sacred rhythms.

And it's somatic work, interpersonal work.

So she calls her therapy integrated family systems where she focused on the different parts

of you that show up in you doing different, you know, interactions or different triggers

or situations.

So that's the kind of therapy.

I do.

My partner has just started therapy and yes, I'm telling his business and he's mad.

I apologize ahead of time, but I do think that everybody should go to therapy.

And the one thing he came back and said the other day was that it's, it's mind blowing

when you have someone being your mirror and holding you accountable.

Because a lot of times when we're in relationships, they bring out our pain body and then those

parts of us show up that's in defense or judgment because we're trying to protect ourselves.

So we can't really, we, it's hard for us to see ourselves like how we're showing up, right?

And what we might be adding to the situation or adding the gas that we might be adding to

the flames.

I do encourage everybody to go to therapy.

Anything else you guys want to add?

I don't think that's viral material there, but because I've been, I've been in therapy and, you

know, it got to the point for me where I was like, if you're not going to therapy, I'm not

going to date you.

Yeah.

You ain't wrong.

And so that's it.

And so like, you know, my significant other isn't therapy.

And it's the same thing for him.

It's just a lot of, like it's a lot.

And I'm like, you can't just go one time.

No, you gotta go in.

You gotta go every week.

You have to go weekly because over here, you, we got some, you got a whole lot of stuff.

We got a lot going on.

Just a lot.

Weakly.

Hey, but what you mean?

You said that.

No, no.

It's my every week.

It's not.

I mean, I'm from an insurance standpoint, but, you know, that's going to be expensive.

That's her avoidance part showing right now where she's avoiding it.

So she's looking for us.

I know.

I'll transfer full transparency.

I need to go to therapy.

I haven't known that for a while.

And she's still getting you a ring.

I did.

I can't tell my business.

Oh, yeah.

The AirPods are not in here.

I didn't say it was crazy.

I didn't say it was therapy.

It was a difference.

So be it.

And then I did for a couple of weeks.

And then to be honest, it got to a point where I was getting homework to do stuff.

And I was like, you're doing too much.

No, like it was, like it's hard to address your issue.

Yeah.

And so avoidance.

I was like, I'm good.

Yeah.

That was fun.

Why it lasted.

I never got to anywhere.

Because also I'm very, I have trust issues.

I don't open up to people.

I don't.

Especially somebody I don't know.

Yeah.

So it gets hard for me to get to a point where I'm comfortable and able to tell the full

truth.

Yeah.

That is.

It was very paranoid.

Yeah.

When I started, I was like, and who's going to see my files?

Yeah.

You know, people know you in the community, right?

Yeah.

You don't know who's like.

Who knows?

And then people will be talking.

I don't even want to talk about the community.

I love our community, but I got to get out of here.

We have to get out of here.

Okay.

We just make a pact.

We can, we should just go all in on the place.

That'll make it real convenient.

Yeah.

And all of our people.

There's ways we can do this.

First of all, we could just live here half time and half time there.

Yeah.

And then we could just buy, like, already, you have property here.

Mm-hmm.

I have a house here.

You got a house.

We can Airbnb.

Or I can stay here.

Okay.

And then you have my house.

I have my houses.

So then we have, we shared.

Yes.

And this already furnished.

We can do this.

Yeah.

Because we got to get out of here.

I feel like, I love Madison and stuff, but this place is, it's definite.

Like every, I feel like every other meeting I go into, I'm reminded that I'm unwanted.

No matter how much work we do and how much, you know, credibility we have in legitimacy

and the fact that we're the only minority, black, brown, or other sitting in these housing circles,

there's no one.

There's no one.

So people can say whatever they want, but there's no one doing the work of housing.

And Madison and the most people that we serve in housing is black.

They're black people and sheltered black people, black families.

And of course, there's tons of homeless white folks, but they just don't show up the same way.

It's not even the same.

It's not the same, y'all.

And then these spaces, every day we get reminded, yeah, you here, you doing the work,

but we would really, we would really appreciate if you wasn't here.

And not because we're doing something wrong, but actually because we're doing it right.

Because what happens when we, when you have an office next to ours in the location,

I'm like, on name, nobody, but if you have an office in the same location, we're doing housing services.

And the line in the place is always down and out the corner for us.

And no one's at your door.

Guess what you mad at?

You mad at us for doing the work.

You're mad at us that people like, no, I'm a way for urban trees.

I'm way all day.

Right?

Because in the reason people are like that with us, not because we have all these resources,

because we do not, it's because we pride ourselves.

And I tell my staff this all the time as centering the humanity of everyone that sits in front of you.

Because they're all going through something and your job is to give them hope and to inspire them.

If that's all they live with, leave with that day, you've done your job.

There's not a lot of resources, but we need to make sure that people come feel with something.

Like let's talk about this, let's vent, let's, let's create goals, let's create pathways through these obstacles.

Let me give you resources, let me sit with you and help you figure that out.

Sometimes that's all people need.

And they're like, thank you for being with me.

Like I don't have family, I don't have anybody.

And you might be the only person that person talks to all day.

Right?

So I don't know y'all.

I'm just kind of tired of Madison.

Like it's just such a Debbie downer place.

I feel like you can't even trust people that you're supposed to be able to trust, you know?

So I don't know.

What's your thoughts about it?

I feel like for one, let's get the pack and go.

I want to echo what you said about the housing part.

Because like I think that the more and more that housing, the part of the things that makes it so inaccessible,

is the rules that people is putting into place to make it out of reach for people.

Yes.

You know the things that like the strict requirements, it makes it out of reach for people who is really living a regular life.

Yeah.

You know?

I, again, I love Madison.

Madison has raised me and my children.

Um, I think that for me, I, I need to leave because I need to be around, um, more black people.

Black people.

I need to be around.

She knows that more.

I need to be in an environment where there's a lot of people who is like, I'm a wellness professional.

I need to be in the wellness industry where I am also like and able to engage and learn from people.

Who is more, you know, skilled than me.

Yeah.

I feel like I want to be around people.

I don't want to be the smartest.

Yeah.

I don't want to be the smartest in the world.

And I don't want to be the only one in the world.

I don't want to be the only one.

And I don't want to enter spaces where people find me as a threat versus a partnership, right?

Yeah.

Or black people and brown people are acting as gatekeepers.

Because I've had a lot of incidents in the last month with brown women.

That's really crazy to me.

Like I'll be in the space and I'll say, well, you know, we got to center black people

because we live in this dichotomy of racism, which at the bottom of the hierarchy is black people.

And you see her face change or their face change on the zoom with all these white people.

Oh, and I just be like, oh my God.

So then I have to remind myself where I'm at.

And then I have to remind myself that their response isn't about me.

It's more about their own anti blackness and them being threatened.

Like there is limited.

Like I'm taking something from them.

So anyway, y'all, I think this is the end of our show.

Oh, no, we got another commercial.

Okay.

Never mind.

The producers say we be back.

We be back.

This is a 92.7 FM.

The black conversion show with your girl Brandy Grayson, April Cagaya, and Kenna.

And we'll be back.

Okay.

Because we have been here for one more round, apparently.

All right.

We back with me Brandy Grayson, 92.7 FM.

The black conversion show.

Thank you for joining us this Saturday.

We just in here acting a fool.

We having fun.

Because that's what you do on Saturdays.

Okay.

You should do that Friday, Monday.

Wait, that's not even order.

Friday Saturdays.

Everyday.

It doesn't matter.

Sunday, Monday.

It's the end of the wire.

Just do it.

And just a friendly reminder that I am doing stand up tonight at the Wilmer Center, which is

for Atwood, I think.

It's like a community center.

Is it the Wilmer?

It's by Willie Street.

Willie Street.

Oh, I messed up.

Not atwood.

Jennifer Street.

Yeah.

And it's a community center.

But they have this invent space.

And I think the host is hosting it there.

So come through.

See me be funny.

And even if I'm not funny, just laugh at me.

Because who likes to be rejected?

Nobody.

But do I care if I'm rejected?

No.

But you should laugh anyway.

Because I got jokes sometimes.

Okay.

And we'll just see how this goes.

Is it going to be a theme?

Yeah.

I haven't even figured it out yet.

I thought that I would talk about being in the sunken place.

And then I would talk about.

I don't know.

What should I talk about?

Um, okay.

Okay.

I'm going to ask you three things.

But I don't know.

What's on the top of your mind?

Girl.

Say the first three things.

Get out the sunken place.

Uh-huh.

Um, being surrounded by black people that so used to be in the sunken place.

That they don't even know they in the sunken place.

The matters that remind me of the get out movie.

What?

Every time you say that to me, I'm like, yes, that's what it is.

You walk on the app when you hit the damn.

Ooh.

Is that a curse word?

When you hit the, um, okay.

Okay.

All right.

I'm good.

Okay.

When you hit the glass of digging, they were like, oh, that's how

Madison is.

So you walk up to black people in the vent.

And you'd be like, hi.

You're like, girl, where are you from?

What?

So the second place.

Madison is second place.

I don't know.

I'm going to be like, damn.

So the second place.

Madison is second place.

I'll be like, damn.

Or they be on the opposite end of the spectrum where they just

So, you know, they write me muggy.

Right, me muggy.

And they just lost.

They just be like, who she thinks she is.

And then they call you the next day.

Like, girl, can you help me?

Girl, you're the same one.

That was on Facebook, dragging me from Yin Yang.

And it didn't go to a platform job.

Girl, you're not going to talk.

I've seen people, names of comments.

And then they be like, brandy.

So I heard you was hiring.

Not to be late.

Girl.

And then what?

Girl, why did I just pull the application?

Someone asked a question about racism.

And they put LOL.

Yeah, right.

And whoever you are, I'm not going to say your name,

because you're listening.

You know who you are.

You just know that we would never interview you.

We would never interview you.

Like, why would you say that LOL?

Tell us their name.

And then they call somebody.

Like, she didn't even return my call.

And give me an interview.

Girl, you put L.

Oh, L.

And your application.

I don't know, y'all.

That's what you should do.

You should talk about like, if you have five minutes said,

maybe do like three stories.

Okay, three stories.

Three fun, three stories.

That's like so wild that people won't even believe is true.

Okay, I could do that.

And then, and they all tied,

tied all of them back to like the second place.

Yes.

And you know what?

Whenever I think about that,

it also makes me think about the joke,

or when he said life is such a comedy.

Girl, this is not a comedy.

This is a whole new dimension.

Madison should be called the new dimension.

The new.

I don't know about new.

Well, I mean, it is a new dimension.

Like, it's not though.

It's the old dimension that's rooted in the,

oh, the sundown.

Oh, the sundown.

Yes, sundown.

The sundown town.

That's what Madison is like the sundown town.

And the crazy thing about Madison is then we have groups of people

who are older,

because I'm old.

Like, I'm about to be 44, y'all.

My birthday is coming up.

Okay.

I thought you knew it.

Okay, I got, look, I got a trust fund.

I got a living wheel.

I got a house now.

Like, I am grown.

You're grown.

Okay.

I even got a whole life insurance policy.

I know that.

That don't end my trust.

So, yes, I'm grown, grown.

Let's talk about that end of the positive box.

With that number.

With the key.

With the positive box.

I need to sneak some money in there.

They said you can't put it in there,

but I'ma sneak some money in there one day.

But just some bond.

That's all I've got up in there.

Put that around the bonds in there.

Huh?

I forgot.

I was about to say I got distracted about being old.

You're so mature birthday.

See how you get old and you.

I was like, wait a minute.

I was on the whole tangent about the sunken place.

Yeah.

Girl, I don't know.

So then when every time that you after you finish the story.

Uh huh.

Then you're going to have the audience like be like,

and be like, this, and that, that's because Madison is what?

And then have the sunken place.

Yeah.

No, because they probably going to be like, she talking about me.

You got to make them say it.

Yeah, you got to make them say it.

And if you think I'm talking about you, it is true.

I'm talking about you.

Probably is because y'all sure are funny acting.

And can we just talk about how people don't want to give nobody

because you know, like for me, I have the worst memory.

So if I'm supposed to cash at you $20 or $30, can you know

that I'm going to forget?

My daughter told me the other day.

She asked me if not the other day.

Maybe a month ago.

She's like, mine cannot borrow some money.

It's like $800.

And I was like, yeah, you could borrow $800.

And I just forgot for like two or three days.

She didn't.

She's going to tell you something about if I didn't know you any better.

I would think you were being janky, right?

What?

But it was a good example of like, I really do be forgetting to pay people.

Like nail people.

Like, I'll leave.

And I'm like, I'll cash at you.

I'll be doing stuff.

Girl, you know, I forgot where I put my cord at five minutes ago.

I'm like, you know, I'm a brain.

Like we're going to, we need to get you on a better bedtime schedule.

Yeah.

I'm floating.

Like you can.

But my whole time, my whole point is that people are unforgiving.

Like they're unforgiving.

They take it so personal.

And people, if I don't return their inbox, they take it personal.

If I don't return their text, if I forget something.

And I just be like, y'all don't even get what my date is.

Right.

I got over 100 new emails a day.

I got 20 crises happening all the time.

I have staff that require almost every day attention, every moment, attention, right?

Like so sometimes I just like Madison is so unforgiving.

And there's no real support.

Yeah.

And I'm just tired of being in a place where black people don't support me.

Where I can't make a call for action to black people to donate five dollars

or recurrent payments and make sure our organization continues.

But then y'all be on Facebook making posts or like making all these just comments.

I'm just tired.

Yeah.

But you know, because the system is set up for us to compete with one another.

Yeah.

But we competing against us for what?

When we could come together, like I told black people, even before we became urban triage.

But when I first came on a scene, we formed this black coalition of black service providers.

And I said as long as we can keep this coalition, we could grab all this money.

Yeah.

Did you think we kept it?

Why?

Because no one wanted to do the work.

And the only time people wanted to show up is when the check was involved.

And when I got a check, then people were like, what my check, girl, where you been in the last ten meetings?

Right.

Where's your work ethic?

Like, where's your commitment to the collaboration?

And then she was like, see, I told you, she just wanted the money for herself.

Like, girl, what money?

Like, you don't understand how nonprofits work.

We get audited by your mama, your daddy, the state, the city, the federal government,

W-E-D-C-W-O-A, doing business, betting, business, bureau.

Everybody audits us.

Every day I get another open records request.

They ask for the receipt to the toilet paper.

Like, there's people crazy, even your acceptance speeches get audited.

Girl.

Right.

Everybody.

That's the black chamber.

That was on there on Thursday.

That was there on Thursday.

We were, yeah.

Yeah.

That was two days ago.

Okay.

We only got one minute.

So I can't even look.

God is good.

See, God said.

Something needs to just gone and be unsaid.

Shout out to everybody that got awards at the black chamber event.

Because what happened last year to me was people were not happy with me.

But we'll talk about that another day because we want to just stay positive as we can

and close out black history month in this place.

We call this sunken place.

So we'll be back again next Saturday.

I think it's 11 a.m.

That the show.

Yes.

It's 11 o'clock our time.

Okay.

It's new now.

Yeah.

Oh, yeah, yeah.

So it's new.

So join us next Saturday.

Okay, y'all.

Same time.

Same place.

Same people.

We're going to invite April again, too.

Because she does all her feelings.

So she's going to be a permanent host, too.

So stay tuned.

Until next time.

92.7 and film.

Black conversion show.

We out.

Bye.

I'll change.